Transitions

Michael and I are all over the place right now.

Here are the transitions that we're in the midst of:

• Moving from the home where we've started off our loving marriage, into the home where we will begin to raise our family;
  
  
• Supporting Michael's parents as they courageously leave McLean for Austin, Texas, and yet grieving a bit as we lose our home base in Northern Virginia;
  
  
• Relinquishing our independent, 20-something selves to become 30-something parents to our beautiful baby girl;
  
  
• Saying goodbye to my grandmother; and
  
  
• Saying goodbye (temporarily) to the petite - and generally speaking comfortable - body I've maintained in order to become very happy parents.

There's obviously much more joy in here than sorrow. But we are in the difficult phase - thinking about many of these transitions before they actually occur. Stressing about movers and paint colors and sleep deprivation before enjoying new routines and loving smiles and three bedrooms. Michael and I are eager to see the comfort we've established in January, and even more thrilled for our little girl to join our lives.

There's lots floating around in my mind about all of these things, but I seem too overwhelmed to really put those down on paper (or computer screen). We'd appreciate prayers for peace and patience!

21 Week Baby Bump

Elizabeth

My grandmother passed away tonight. She was 91 years old and had lived a full, rich life. Together with my grandfather, my grandmother raised 5 children and 10 grandchildren. She traveled the world when it wasn't exactly fashionable for people - let alone women - to do so. She was born in India and inspired her grandkids with stories of road trips from London to India, cruises on sail boats from California to Peru, and car rides through Afghanistan.

That said, I think the element of my grandmother's life that left me most in awe was the profound love she shared with my grandfather. Anyone lucky enough to be in a room with the two of them quickly discovered that they were with kindred spirits. True, their relationship began in a different era, when divorce and separation were unheard of. But my grandparents' love for one another went beyond the comforts of sharing stories and raising children. They genuinely enjoyed one another's company. They kept each other laughing, served one another, honored one another, amused one another, even after death. My grandfather passed away in 2002, but I don't think I heard my grandmother say more than three sentences without bringing him up. Being with my grandmother meant spending time with my grandfather, and vice versa. The two of them were uniquely paired, clearly divinely created for one another.

When my grandmother died tonight, I was cooking dinner for my husband. I was imagining how happy my grandfather would be to have my grandmother with him again. I was thinking about their treasured memories that none of us will ever know - the times they shared, like Michael and I share now, that aren't recorded by children or friends or neighbors. Times that passed between the two of them that nobody else could alter.

I cherish those moments that I share with my husband now, and feel like my marriage is the greatest way of honoring my grandparents' memories. I think if they could see the ways my husband and I are with one another now, when it is just the two of us, before we become ever-expanding units with children, then grandchildren, then greats, they would be pleased. They would recognize these times are tributes to them, and be proud of the legacy they have left behind.

Upside Down

What a week!

First, we found out that our little boy is actually a little GIRL! For weeks, we've been imaging our new family with a baby boy at its center, as our family unit dominated by males. We've been rubbing my belly, asking him what names he likes, talking about raising a little man. And now we're back to square one! We're rethinking this future, now with a baby girl at its heart. It's amazing and exciting and daunting all the same. For some reason, a boy seems... easier to me. A girl is scary! Wish us luck! Here's a picture of her beautiful profile:


Second, Michael and I found a new home! Our new apartment is a gorgeous, large 3-bedroom just north of Columbia. It's about three times the size of our current place and will be a lovely place to build our family. We even have room to host family and friends!

Michael's & My Bedroom

The Study/Guest Bedroom

Our Little GIRL's Room

Our Living Room

The Kitchen

Insanity

For news of yesterday's chaos, please visit M's blog here.

Veterans Day 2009

Today is Veterans Day. It's the second year I've marked the occasion since beginning my blog (last year's post is here), and I must admit that my feelings on the matter haven't changed much.

It comes as no surprise that I wholeheartedly adore President Obama. I think he is the best there is, and that I am not likely to know any better during my lifetime. That said, I still long for calls to sacrifice on behalf of the hundreds of thousands of families effected by the two wars we're currently fighting. I find myself fairly insulated from the realities of war. My husband and I live together. I don't worry for his safety on a daily basis. We don't have to raise children using Skype. I don't worry about post traumatic stress or the psychological impacts of combat.

I'm grateful to live free of these burdens. But is it fair that I can continue to do so, sheltered from these realities? I don't know how to solve this problem, but I do know that I am so beyond grateful to those men and women who agree to leave friends and family behind to go serve our country, regardless of their feelings about the wars that separate them.

What will I tell my son about war, and service to our country?

Donations on behalf of families who lost loved ones in service can be made here:
Special Operations Warrior Foundation

20 Week Baby Bump!

Can you tell?!?! I've had three strangers ask me when I'm due, so I think it's official!

Hilarious!

Fall Foliage

From an above-ground M Train in Brooklyn

With my Very Good Looking Hubby

Delicious

At 8 PM last night, Michael and I returned to reality. We spent the most glorious three days in Miami, living in some dream world. It was utterly delicious.

The trip was meant to be our last vacation requiring plane travel before the baby arrives. So we did it up! We stayed at the Trump International Beach Resort, and never left its warm embrace. We dined in our rooms, down by the pool, at the resort restaurants. We played in the pool for hours, read for pleasure, and even splurged for massages.



This was the first vacation Michael and I have had without beloved family or friends since Asia, and it felt wonderful to be alone (with our little boy, of course). This was a particularly sinful type of getaway - one where you didn't let yourself feel guilty about laying around and doing nothing, about not visiting downtown Miami or about spending too much money. We just spent time together, and enjoyed the peace and quiet. We even managed to keep our cell phones locked away for much of the trip - truly a special occasion.

Throughout we discussed our little developing family - our excitement for this little boy to join us, for the children that will follow. We talked about the challenges of being parents, and the names we might give our kids. The resort was bizarrely international. We were two of only a handful of Americans there - most were European families. It was reassuring to see them playing in the pool together, traveling with extended networks of families and friends, to see parents having fun playing with their children and seeing kids just LOVING the pool.

Boarding the plane last night, we both remarked on how this might be the last of the easy passes through security. Next time, we'll be the ones with babies and strollers and diaper bags and all the goodness that goes along with it. Pretty exciting!!

My Delicious Virgin Pina Colada

Michael's Delicious and Very Non-Virgin Pina Colada

In the Meantime

Tomorrow, a more detailed post about our amazing getaway. But for now...

Fun!

It's that lovely time of year - when it feels good to be in the kitchen again.

I've missed cooking. Between the nausea and exhaustion of my first trimester, I spent little time in the kitchen this summer. But now that the weather has cooled, the evenings are darker, and my second trimester energy is here, I've been happily back, cooking away! We've been eating comfort foods like stuffed shells and lasagna, beef brisket and tacos, quesadillas and baked chicken. It's been lovely! I've also been really missing baking, and managed to produce a couple of apple pies and plenty of chocolate chip cookies.

It's an inspiring time of year to be in the kitchen, and I'm excited for some new recipes! If you have any favorites, feel free to pass them along!

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Oh, and if anyone has a good recipe for butternut squash, I'd love to see it!!

18 Week Baby Bump!

The Weekend that Wasn't

Well, the best laid plans...

Michael and I had a weekend that... well, didn't go quite as we had hoped. The weekend started off well, with a relaxing dinner on Friday night at Michael's and my favorite new pizza place, Spunto. The restaurant is a few blocks from our apartment, filled with warm yellow light and neighborhood charm. We enjoyed a couple of types of pizza and settled into a Friday evening.

We woke on Saturday, excited for a fun day with John, Anna and Naomi. For months, Anna and I have been talking about taking a tour of small, quaint towns nestled in the Hudson Valley during peak foliage season. So John booked us a Zip Car and we picked out 3 towns to check out. The day started with an early alarm and no hot water. Logistical irritations, sure, but the other kicker? Rain. Lots and lots of rain. Because we'd been discussing this trip for months, we made our best effort. We packed up a car with Naomi and all of her goodies, and headed north up the river. Try as we might, we couldn't find quaint New York!! We tried Tarrytown, then Sleepy Hollow, to no avail. We started seeing signs of cute in Ossining, just as Naomi started to tire of her car seat. Finally, we found charm in Croton-on-Hudson. But by that point Naomi was crying unabashedly and we were tired of being wet and in the car. Thankfully John and Anna are the kind of people that find humor in ridiculous situations, so the harder Naomi cried, the harder Anna and I laughed at the absurdity of our travels.

Sunday we hoped for better luck. Once again we woke to an alarm, which was not ideal. We had hot water, which was thrilling, but we didn't have our Sunday paper. Michael headed over to our gym for his first class, and I planned on meeting him there. But unfortunately our gym teacher never showed! So we both attempted to get a good workout in on our own, which was far less successful... Our afternoons were packed, with a lovely dimsum lunch in Chinatown with girlfriends from grad school and then tea with my former roommate and wonderful friend Jordana.

The weekend wasn't a complete loss - we spent some quality time with good friends, took a nice long walk in the fall sunshine, and had a delicious dinner of stuffed shells tonight. But we definitely don't feel as relaxed as we usually do at the end of a Sunday evening.

Thankfully we're off to Miami next weekend! Hooray!

Turning Points

First, if you haven't done so already, please share your most peaceful moments here (ahem Jenny, Dad, Henry, Ruthie). I've been LOVING all your thoughts, and find immediate relaxation while reading them. And you know what's interesting? How many people find peace in moments with warm drinks in their hands. Something I'll have to remember when I'm stressed at work!

Second, Michael and I have started casually looking for new apartments, and it is making me so sad! For the past few months, I've been the excited one, telling Michael how much fun it will be to find and build a new home, one with actual DOORS, and room for a baby. But now that it's becoming more of a reality, it's less thrilling. Michael and I have enjoyed our first three years of marriage in this lovely little apartment. We've made friends with our neighbors, gym teachers, book sellers, laundry folks. We know our neighborhood and can now actually afford to enjoy it a bit more. Anyway, I think this move is going to be very hard for us both.

Sharing

Okay, so I thought I might try something new on this little blog of mine. Something that is sure to garner a little mocking from my husband and my brother, but let's give it a go...

On Sunday, I flipped through this month's Real Simple magazine to find a whole section where people wrote about their most peaceful time of day. I found it very pleasureable to hear what others say! Since I've shared mine (early morning tea just can't be beat), I was wondering if you would be willing to share yours?? I'd love to hear what part of the day calms you the most!!

17 Week Baby Bump!

Success!

Tonight I made one of my mom's greatest hits: beef brisket! It was delicious!!

Yesterday, Michael and I took the plunge and made our first meat purchase from the farmers market. We bought a nice, fatty Angus Beef Brisket from a husband and wife couple whose kids were back at the farm, tending to the animals. We marinated the beef last night and then let it cook at a low heat for 3 hours this afternoon. Our entire apartment smells delicious! Here are some pictures:

Yummy Beef

Beef, String Beans from the market
and my first attempt at Mashed Cauliflower
(also from the market, and not very successful)

Peace

Sitting on our coach, gazing out the window at the crystal blue morning sky. Noises of a neighborhood waking just outside the building - sidewalks being swept, early morning commuters greeting one another. Michael still in bed, enjoying the last few minutes of sleep before another hectic day. Warm tea in hand and a baby boy growing inside, keeping me company. Just peace.

As they say in country music, yeah man, that's the good stuff.

Boy oh boy!

Last week, Michael and I spent 30 minutes watching our little baby swim and squirm. At 15 weeks, our little one looks more human than it had before. So human, in fact, that we learned our baby is a little boy!

Here he is waving to Michael and me:


And him stretching his back:


And him showing off his little foot:


The entire sonogram was a thrilling experience, and Michael and I loved having the chance to see our little boy moving around, kicking his legs and shaking his head.

When the doctor told us we were having a boy, it confirmed what I'd been feeling for a few weeks. Even earlier that day, I sent an email to Michael, telling him that I was confident that our baby was a he, not a she. This will sound silly and ridiculous, but being right about the baby's sex has given me confidence in my connection with him. Right now, the fact that I'm pregnant is still a little abstract - I don't really look pregnant, and I haven't felt the baby move around. But I did have an instinct about the sex - one that was pretty accurate - and that's exciting to me.

My friend Melissa just had a boy, and I'm reassured that we'll be learning about boys together. It's going to be great!

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On an utterly unrelated note, this Sunday's Times magazine was all about food, and it's well worth the read. Just click here.