This week was overwhelming.
Michael was out of town so I was playing the role of single mom. He returned on Friday, just in time to celebrate his 31st birthday. And, as I mentioned previously, it was one of the most significant weeks of my professional life. I spent most of the week running - from one meeting to the next, from work to daycare to home to daycare to work - and trying to keep my head above water. I think I managed to do pretty well overall, though I have to admit to several dinners of beer and cereal and falling asleep in front of my computer once or twice (thankfully that was while doing work at home in the evenings, not midday in the office).
So, needless to say, this weekend has been about recovery. There are things I need to do - our taxes, for example. Or unloading the dishwasher. Or cleaning up the kitchen. Or making a grocery list. Or even reading. But instead I've just been sitting still, enjoying the sunshine in our beautiful new play room, and having some quiet time while Alice naps.
In order to keep my head above water lately, I feel like I've let a few important things slide. I don't really know what's going on in the world, beyond revolt after revolt after revolt. And I have too many friends to whom I owe emails or phone calls. The danger in falling to far behind in these things is that it is far too easy to become boring, to have nothing to discuss beyond work and Alice, and to grow lonely.
I keep telling myself that this pace is just a temporary thing, that it reflects the phase of life we are in, that eventually it will get easier to maintain relationships beyond the two most important in my life - the ones with my husband and my baby. But really I think I just need to carve out the space for other things. I don't think life gets slower - you just prioritize differently.
Perhaps this is my goal for Lent. Finding a way to better balance all the things in my life, to find energy for things beyond the day-to-day demands of life.
As a PS, I am happy. I am in love. I am finding fulfillment professionally as well as personally. I just wish each day had 40 hours in it!
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