Missing Daddy

Sicky

Heaven (as always)

 

Sadly, Michael had to work today. But Alice and I enjoyed quite an adventure. We went to the Bronx Botanical Gardens to enjoy the Haunted Pumpkin Garden and it was fabulous! We did some "rock climbing" and watched some characters dance around and enjoyed some time with ducks and rode the tram around the gardens and ran around among the roses and enjoyed some hot chocolate.

 

Days like today make me so sad to be working, or to not have more time at home with Alice. I'm so looking forward to maternity leave to be able to enjoy adventures with both our little ones. 

 

There have been some very special days with Alice over the past two years. Days like today. And our trip to the Botanical Gardens last winter to see the trains. And our trip to the beach in Staten Island this summer. And so many more. 

I hope to remember these days forever.

Ballet

Last night, Anna and I took our big girls to the ballet. The New York City Center was hosting a fall dance festival, and tickets were reasonable enough that Anna and I agreed we wouldn't feel horrible if we had to leave after 5 minutes.

The girls were absolutely amazing. Both Naomi and Alice were mesmerized, and stayed reasonably quiet throughout the whole experience. We stayed for three of the four performances - an Indian dance, a ballet and a modern piece. I was surprised by how interested Alice was in the modern dancers. I was taken (unsurprisingly) by the romantic pas de deux. Anna and I both talked about how pleasant it was to be taking in some city culture.

It was a beautiful night, one that we will remember for a long time.

Alice, Naomi, Anna and I just before the lights went down.

Anna, Alice and Naomi after the first performance.

Alice covering her ears as the train pulls into the station. "It's too loud, Momma!!"

34 Weeks! And yes, there's only 1!

 

Seeing how huge I am... well, it makes me feel better about being a hormonal mess. I've had a few days of just being in a bad mood regardless of what I could do. Miserable.

I can't wait to meet this little love. He's super active in my belly. Sometimes his feet are pressed up against my stomach and I can tickle him. It is such fun. It will be more fun when he is healthy and here.

Yup

Tired Bubba

Efforts

I've been in my new job for a couple of months now and, I must admit, I'm really enjoying it. It's been great to think about new things, to deepen my analytic skills, and to try my hand at something different.

But, it's difficult. I'm exhausted. I'm really pregnant. I'm grouchy. And I have a family waiting for me at home.

The reality is I need more time in my life to dedicate to my job and my family. This week I know I will have to work late on Thursday, so when I left the office 45 minutes later than normal, I still had at least 2 hours of work that I should have done. I can't seem to find enough time - nor, let's be honest, the stamina - to get my work done at the level I want.

It's frustrating how women's professional and personal lives demand the most at about the same time. I'm grateful for a husband who cares about my career, who understands when I need to work late, who can trade nights in the office with me. And I'm really relieved to have this new-found energy for my job, to feel more energetic about the tasks ahead of me. I just wish there were enough hours in the day to do what needs to be done.

Ah, life. I'm so blessed.

33 Week Baby "Bump"!

Busy Bodies

Family Fun!

32 Weeks!

Bedtime

Alice, petting my head.

"Momma, you're the best in the whole world."

My heart melts.

Daze

The past couple of weeks have been focused on potty training and switching Alice to the big girl bed. Which has left us exhausted.

Here's the day in a nutshell: Alice and I are up at 6:30. We read a book, drink a cup of tea, and take a shower together. We make lunch and eat breakfast. I get dressed and RUN to work. Then I run, anxious to do a good job for at least eight hours. Then run home and fix dinner and have quality family time. Then Alice and I take a bath and we read some books and we try to get her ready for sleeping. Then we do some work. And I crash.

And soon there will be another baby in this mix?

30 Week Baby Bump!!

Big Girl

29 Week Baby Bump!

Loving

This weekend, Michael, Alice and I had a whirlwind trip to the DC area. We left on the 6:45 am train on Saturday morning, and came back on the 8:10 am train today. Not much sleep (I need a vacation after my long weekend), but all for a great cause: we were elebrating my brother's engagement.

The party was - unsurprisingly - perfect. My mom knows how to throw a shindig! The house looked amazing, and the food was delicious. And it was just awesome to meet Eileen's family. They were all so fun and warm, just like Eileen. It's exciting to add a new addition to our family unit, to have another person join the holiday fray. The best part is that we genuinely like Eileen.

This post should be longer and more specific, but it's too late for that. But just to share our lasting feelings from the weekend: exhaustion, love and excitement.

Another Reason I'm Excited for November

27 weeks!

Alice's Self Portrait

25 weeks!

We thought she was sleeping in the big girl bed...

Breathing

 

We have had a stressful, and absolutely wonderful, stretch. July passed in a blurry haze of travel, with trips to Massachusetts, Bethlehem and Rehoboth Beach. Mom came to help watch Alice several times after our nanny left to have her baby girl. Michael and I took turns watching our sweet girl. And - did I forget to mention? - I started a new job!

In many ways, I feel like I did in high school, just before starting a new year of classes. Michael and I are settling down into city life for the next few months. We've found a lovely young woman to watch Alice until her brother joins us. And I'm ready to sink my teeth into this new job. I've come back from vacation rested, and eager to hold on to the peace that defined most of our time away from the city.

Several weeks ago, there was a fabulous article in the Times called, "The Busy Trap." I've been thinking a lot about how to structure our lives in such a way that we don't buy into this absurdity. I'd like to be conscientious about this, particularly over the next few months before our new baby arrives. Any suggestions are welcome!

Some of my other favorite pictures from our vacation:

 

 

 

 

 

Day with Daddy

My New Office

Beginnings

Tomorrow my new job begins! It's mildly overwhelming. But I've enjoyed a lovely long weekend, and some special time with Alice. More to share on another day...

Baking

Sunset

Adventures in Babysitting

Today Alice and I went to a beach in Staten Island! Henry generously left us his car, so we have been taking advantage of it, driving out of the city as much as possible. I can't believe this beautiful beach is only 1 hour from our house - what a treat! Alice loved burying her feet in the sand, watching the water come in and out, and jumping over the water. She also loved the ice cream!

She didn't really like sharing it with me, though...

I am very emotional these days. Between the pregnancy and the job transition, there seems to be a lot going on in my head. I am going to miss my colleagues/friends so much, and leaving something you know for something you don't is just... horrifying. I've had so many horrible work experiences - terrible bosses, general meanness, and lots of whinny folks. But my tenure at the Health Department has been marked by the complete opposite - nothing but love, support, encouragement and faith. I am just trying to remind myself that I am no longer a 23-year old youngster who doesn't know how to respond to difficult situations. And that I have heard lovely things about my new office. I'm excited for the new challenge, and a little daunted by it as well...

I'm so pregnant

Dreams of Drives

Water

Balance

Happiness is...

Changes

 

This is the summer of change. On Wednesday, I resigned from my job at the Health Department. After 5 years working with the same amazing and inspiring team, I've accepted a new position in education.

I've been very conflicted about this decision. I interviewed for the job back in January, and as the slow, S L O W wheels of City beuracracy turned, I debated the move endlessly. Oh, and I also got pregnant. 

As I understand it, my new job will require more hours, more stress, and more analytic skills than I currently possess.  But it also comes with a slightly higher profile, more pay, and a new and engaging environment. I'm moving from an office that understands what it means to be a mother of young children into one that is occupied by younger, single women. Is this a good move? Who knows! But I do think it is time for a professional change.

Additional news from last week: our nanny left for (indefinite) maternity leave. We are facing a month without steady child care, but actually I'm excited. My mom is coming up for a bunch of days, Michael and I are both taking some time off, and we've hired a babysitting service for a few days as well. We're looking forward to a month of having Alice at home, not having to commute the 20 blocks south to our friends' house, and just enjoying the long summer days.

Please pray for our household. These changes are good, ultimately, but they are stressful, and not without worry. Thank you.

June

Warning: this is the most boring post ever.

I realize it's been a while since I actually wrote anything on this little blog. I've gotten good at posting pictures, but not at sitting down and putting "pen" to paper.

June has been a hectic and stressful month. We're in the midst of transition around here - our nanny is about to have her baby, so our childcare arrangements are changing yet again. My professional life has been topsy-turvy. And we spent a few days stressed over test results for our sweet baby baby boy (who is totally healthy, thank goodness!).

So all this to say - I'm sorry I've been so quiet. I've missed writing as a way to process what I'm thinking and feeling. My poor husband has been stuck with a rather emotional wife lately. I'll try to be better...

I have re-instituted one part of life that makes me slightly more sane: my morning cup of tea. Now that the sun is up nice and early, and my first trimester has come and gone, I'm back to waking 30 minutes before the rest of the house to enjoy some quiet time, reading and drinking my tea. So soothing.

Cute

19 weeks!

Say hello, baby boy!!

16 Week Baby Bump!